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With the breezy spring mornings upon us a few mornings ago, I enjoyed some fresh air coming through our home. Josh had left for the office, and our kids were still sleeping. Homeschool life these days has meant that they go to bed probably too late and wake up also probably too late. But I honestly haven’t minded the different pace in the morning, especially with all that is going on. I was able to spend some time with the Lord through my Bible Recap study that I’ve been doing with a group of teen girls. Then I played some worship music while I got the coffee going, laundry started, bed made, and all the things that come in a day. This morning was a beautiful reminder of the character of our God, his heart for his people, and the worship he deserves. I found myself being super reflective and a little teary thinking about the entire relationship Josh and I have shared together. My mind wandered through years of youth ministry together, our dating relationship and marriage, our time with our foster daughter, getting our pup Cocoa, and walking through the eventual and precious parenting years together of our two kiddos.

I had this wonderful, comforting realization that God has always been faithful and He always will be. Some dear friends, who walked through the heavy loss of their daughter a few years ago, gifted us a journal with their daughter’s favorite verse printed on the cover: “Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness” (Isaiah 41:10). They encouraged us to do what they wished they had been better at doing in their grief: to journal ways we have seen the Lord at work, even through the pain and trials, to always remember who God is and that He is with us in the midst of all that is going on.

One night, about two weeks after Josh’s diagnosis, we took about 45 minutes as a family to write and reflect on this journey thus far. Addy and I took turns writing down ways we have seen the Lord use our circumstances for His glory. The list was already about 5 pages long over the course of two weeks. Now, several weeks in, there are countless ways our prayers are being answered. We are grateful for the friend who said, “I’m not asking, I’m telling you I’m going to be bringing you some meals this week to help out.” We’re overwhelmed by the kindness of a friend who drove from Idaho to come and pray with us before Josh’s MRI and CT Scan, and the sweet friend who delivered a hot meal to us after a long day of these tests. The numerous texts, phone calls, emails, and cards we’ve received saying that people are praying for us, and the hugs have meant the world. We have an incredibly supportive family who have been intentional in checking in and offering support, and our beautiful church body has wrapped us up in so much love and encouraging words. Sweet neighbors have given us hugs and shoulders to cry on and other friends have gifted us intentional books for our hearts and minds. And just today, Josh came home and showed me a GoFundMe page that a fellow pastor friend set up for us without us knowing about it. We are just so overwhelmed by all of this kindness.

I can’t imagine doing this alone, and my heart breaks for those who may not have that same support. No one should have to walk through scary diagnoses like cancer alone.

We have said that this is the month of “wait and see.” We’ve had appointments and tests and there’s a lull of waiting in between for plans to be made for treatment. We’re not sure what to plan exactly in our normal lives with our family and ministry, but we’re learning to trust the Lord in a new way through all of this. I’m so proud of my husband through all of this. He’s been a trooper through awkward tests and drinking strange solutions, and weird things happening to his body. We’re learning more about that whole “In sickness and in health” bit from our marriage vows, for sure!

Cancer is no respecter of persons. We were told by Josh’s surgeon recently that just five years ago, the treatment would have looked much different for his cancer. The reality is that we live in a world with brokenness, disease, and pain. None of this is God’s original heart for his creation. And this isn’t how the story will end.

As friends and family share scriptures with us, my sister-in-law, Abbie and I have written them down on watercolored paper. We created a wall in our dining room/kitchen of all of these scriptures for us to reflect on and be reminded of the truth. I’m doing my best to write them down as we receive them to add to our wall.

Prayer Points:

Please pray for health for our family as we have some colds going on and want Josh to be as good as he can before beginning chemo. So far Josh is safe!

Pray for details and scheduling to come together for chemo and that we can develop a rhythm before and after chemo that will be helpful for Josh and our responsibilities.

We found out today that Josh’s port for chemo will be put in on Monday, the 19th, and we suspect chemo will begin that week. We also learned yesterday that the chemo schedule will be once every other week, for twelve weeks. There’s a decent likelihood that surgery will be needed after that.

Please pray for doctors and nurses, technicians, secretaries, and everyone we come in contact with during this process. Pray that our witness will be consistent and one that points to the Holy Spirit at work in our lives, even through this.

Please pray for our kids as they are processing and will probably see their daddy go through some tough physical days with limitations they haven’t been used to seeing in him. Pray for Josh to mentally know that those limitations are for a season, and to know that He is loved by so many, not just for what he does, but for who he is. Pray for him to know that limitations are not a weakness, but yet another way that God can be glorified through his life, and that his life absolutely has meaning and significance, despite not being able to do his normal things.

Thank you for praying and for your incredible support. It truly means so much, and with our hope in the Lord, we are being sustained and held in such abundant ways.

Anna 🙂

On Wednesday, April 23, I had an appointment with the OHSU Knight Cancer Institute in Tualatin. WOW…amazing. My oncologist is top-notch. So friendly and genuinely concerned about my health and comfort. Anna came prepared to take notes, but they actually had a notetaker assigned to be in the room, so we could focus and hear things well. They were incredible and made sure to take the time to answer any questions we had.

At this appointment, we were told that the tumor is between stages 1 and 2; so I am saying 1.5. This is great news. My doctor said that the treatment is very good for this tumor.

On May 1, my oncologist will present my case before the ‘cancer board’. Every Thursday, all the doctors working on my case will meet together to discuss the best course of action for treatment for my cancer. She said this is a great approach, as I not only have her expertise but have the expertise of many more doctors.

I was told that the week of May 5th, I would have a port installed so I can receive IVs and get blood draws more easily. The port will stay in for as long as I am in treatment, I am told.

My oncologist said that she is looking to do chemotherapy first, and at the time, is not sure about radiation. She is hopeful that the tumor will respond well to the treatment.

On April 28, I had a meeting with a surgeon to discuss the option of surgery to remove the tumor. He was fantastic. Again, super friendly and very understanding. He is going to be a great addition to my team. He said he will not be recommending surgery at this point and to lean on my oncologist and the OHSU team’s wisdom. He did confirm the size of the tumor.

He said that surgery is not a good first option because of where it is located. Unfortunately, the tumor can’t just be removed. Surgery would entail cutting the rectum in about the middle and having to reconstruct. It would mean a bag for about 3 months after that, as it is healing. We are praying that I can be in about the 20 to 30 percent of patients where chemo and radiation completely kill the cancer before surgery is needed.

Please pray for us as we move into the next phase of this journey. The Lord is good and we are learning to see his provisions and faithfulness every day.

I would also like to ask for prayer that financial aid will be approved at OHSU and at The Oregon Clinic. Insurance is paying, but as you know, insurance doesn’t pay for everything. We know the Lord will provide in amazing ways.

My family has been so blessed by all your prayers, texts and calls. We know the Lord is in this and his glory will be shown through it all. Galatians 1:5: “All glory to God forever and ever!”

I’ll leave you with the face of joy that Anna insisted she take to commemorate some fun procedures that I had to undergo after this. I will say, this experience has been humble in many ways thus far.

What a beautiful day it was! I hope you were able to enjoy the lovely weather.

As some of you might know, I had a couple of medical tests today—a MRI and a CT scan. I have to say, the team at Adventist Health Imaging was amazing! Throughout this whole experience, I’ve been fortunate to be surrounded by such kind and caring people.

This morning, Anna and I arrived at Adventist Health around 8:00 AM to check in at 8:45 AM. However, we ran into a bit of a surprising issue that could have spoiled our day. We found out that the CT scan we were expecting wasn’t scheduled. I had confirmed it with Michael from scheduling, who assured me everything was in place. But, to our surprise, it wasn’t in the system at all.

After we checked in, a wonderful staff member jumped into action to resolve the situation. She called my doctor to get the orders again, and then we needed to reach out to scheduling. Anna offered to handle that while I went in for the MRI.

When it was my turn, Rick, the technician, led me to a room where I could leave my belongings. Thankfully, Anna had taken care of all my metal items. I waited about five minutes for Jeremy, the tech who would conduct the MRI, to come and get me.

Jeremy was incredibly kind and explained what would happen during the procedure, including the IV they would use. He told me I was lucky since I would get to use their machine for the longest time they offer, which meant I’d be inside the machine for about an hour and forty-five minutes.

Once I was all set, I was given ear protection, and the procedure began. I’d heard that being in an MRI could be uncomfortable, but honestly, it wasn’t as bad as I expected. Even though I was fully inside the machine, I didn’t feel trapped or anxious. At first, I was a bit worried about the results, but then I felt a sense of calm wash over me.

During the scan, I found myself praying for various things: the procedure itself, the technicians helping me, that we could still schedule the CT scan, and, of course, for my family. About halfway through the MRI, I felt the Lord leading to pray for the people at Park Place. I envisioned our sanctuary and started to pray up and down the rows.

I truly believe that God was with me in that MRI machine, providing peace and comfort.

Once the MRI was complete, Rick and Jeremy prepped me for the next part. Jeremy worked on me while Rick shared some good news: they had resolved the scheduling issue for the CT scan, and Anna had the details.

After the MRI, they didn’t remove the IV from my arm since it would be used for the CT scan. Rick wrapped it up nicely and reminded me to stay calm until we could do the CT.

When I met up with Anna, she told me everything that had happened while I was undergoing the MRI. One of the MRI machines had malfunctioned, which surprisingly gave Rick the time he needed to help Anna arrange the CT scan. They managed to get us an appointment for 3:30 PM in Clackamas.

What started as a potential problem turned into a wonderful experience, and I saw the hand of God at work. The unexpected machine breakdown allowed Rick to help Anna, and it all unfolded perfectly.

Fast forward to 3:30 PM at the CT scan in Clackamas—everything went smoothly. I had to drink a strange liquid that would help the images show up better under the X-rays. Then John, the technician, explained what to expect. The CT machine looked somewhat like the MRI but worked a bit differently.

Finally, after 31 hours of fasting, I was able to go home and eat!

We have some preliminary results from MyChart and some research I did on Google. The findings are in line with what I suspected and what my doctors had suggested. I will wait for the official confirmation, but I’m relieved to share that the cancer hasn’t spread to my lymph nodes and hasn’t breached the wall of my colon. PRAISE THE LORD!

My next appointment is set for April 28 with a surgeon. I’m still working on finding an oncologist, so I’d appreciate your prayers that this comes together soon.

God is good. Despite the challenges today, everything turned out wonderfully, and I’m grateful for the amazing people in my life. I feel incredibly blessed by all your love, support, and prayers.

Blessings to you all,

-Pastor Josh

I am sincerely grateful for the love and support you have shown me and my family on Sunday.

I am so blessed to pastor such amazing people. You all are truly amazing to my family. I cannot imagine going through something like this without your love and support. My phone and email have been flooded with notes from many of you. THANK YOU!

The Lord is so good, even with a diagnosis of cancer. I know there will be moments of dark times, but the Lord is already shining through and showing us his love and grace.

The Lord is already using this for His glory, and we will see him move even more in the days ahead.

As a family, we are learning a new way to trust the Lord. My sermons are going to be lived out in me in greater ways. I am already thinking of the sermons in Joshua about the battles that were won with the Lord’s help. The people needed to keep the Lord first and be in the Word and devoted to Him. I personally have battles ahead but with my family and church family beside me and praying with and for me, the results are going to be amazing.

My family is clinging to 1 Peter 5:7, Psalm 23, and Romans 15:13. We will remind ourselves daily of the Lord’s faithfulness and goodness during this time. We are going to place verses in many places in our home. When we are in need, where do we go? I want to stand firm on Joshua 24:15.

My next big thing is April 15 for a pelvic MRI. I’m praying the scan shows the cancer is only isolated to the rectum. I will keep you posted as things come up so you can pray.

I know this public announcement affects many of you personally, and I understand that. I’m here to talk and pray with you if you need support. The potluck was special because I heard people sharing their needs and health concerns. Remember, you are not alone. Galatians 6:2 tells us to “Carry each other’s burdens.” We should support and care for one another. You are not hidden, and you are NOT a burden. Please share what is happening in your life so we can pray for you and help in any way we can. We can’t offer support without knowing the problem.

Thank you for reading this and praying for and with us. I am blessed beyond measure by each and every one of you. Please pray for the Lord’s will to be done ultimately and for God to use even this for his glory.

“When all I see is the battle, You see my victory
When all I see is the mountain, You see a mountain moved
And as I walk through the shadow, Your love surrounds me
There’s nothing to fear now, for I am safe with You” (Battle Belongs, Phil Wickham)

Love you all,

Pastor Josh, Anna, Addy, and Josiah

On March 30 I made an announcement to the church about my health.